It's Fine
by Haruka Kamiya
Summary: A teenage Kobayashi learns a major trait about herself. Written in the spirit of Pride Month.


There's not much in the way of speculation about Kobayashi's youth besides her canon "eh I guess I had a normal upbringing?" but also, it's Pride Month (June), so there's clearly Gay Emotions going on here. ALSO I gave her a first name: Haruka.

* * *

"Haaah, the sky looks so pretty today!" exclaimed a teenage girl with long black hair in pigtails, spinning around a couple of times to exert the energy behind her emotion.

Her companion, a girl with auburn hair in a ponytail and glasses, glanced up from her cell phone, finalizing a text. "Hm?" she gazed at the sky to see what her friend was talking about. It was just a normal blue sky with minimal clouds.

" _Mou,_ Haru-san, you're not even listening, are you?!" Asami Honda pouted. "Always spacing out!"

Haruka Kobayashi, known as Haru among her family and schoolmates, had the decency to look sheepish. "Yeah, well, I've got a lot on my mind."

Asami rolled her eyes. "No, you're just wanting to get home so you can play games!"

Haru rubbed the back of her head. "You got me..."

"What kind of games are you playing at home, anyway? Like, Mario Kart?"

Haru sighed, "I've told you before I play RPGs, Asami-san." Asami, always conveniently forgetting. But it was fine.

Asami pushed a pigtail behind her shoulder. "Well, have fun with that! I'll see you in class tomorrow, Haru-san!"

Haru nodded and watched Asami depart before she looked down at her phone, groaning as she witnessed the loss of her puzzle game because she had been distracted. That Asami... always distracting her.

This was annoying. She closed her phone and pocketed it in her skirt. She had begged her mother to modify her uniform skirts to have pockets. She wasn't a skirt kind of girl. She also needed pockets. So, naturally, the modifications were mandatory for Haru's productivity in life.

She began to walk home.

* * *

"Kobayashi, read the next section, please!"

Haru immediately snapped out of dissociation when the teacher called her name. "Y-yes!" she stumbled as she stood up and grabbed her book.

When the reading was over, Haru quickly sat down and decided to secretly peek at Asami. She blushed. When she realized that she was blushing, she quietly coughed and averted her gaze. _This isn't normal._

 _Of course it is_ , she argued back to herself. _This is fine, right?_

She mentally shrugged as she shifted her attention back to her homework. She would deal with it later.

The bell rang for lunch. Haru pulled out her bento box full of bacon and eggs, just how she liked them. She picked up a strip of bacon and placed it in her mouth, daring to turn to look at Asami again.

"Hm." she uttered aloud.

She would Google it when she got home. Well, actually... It was lunch break, she could just pull out her phone to do the Googling.

She muttered along with her typing, "I... think... a girl... is cute. I'm... also... a girl."

Haru wasn't stupid; she knew there existed women that were attracted to and preferred other women. But sometimes, a girl needed confirmation for herself. Haru was such a loner and Asami was really more an acquaintance than a close friend, but she was still nice. It never crossed Haru's mind to figure romance into the picture of her high school life.

She turned red as she decided not to face the Google results just yet.

 _I need to wait until I get home._

* * *

"Aggghhh," Haru groaned as she glared at her homework. Literature analysis again. She shoved the books and papers aside as she booted up her desktop computer.

She was certain that she wouldn't be caught researching, as she quickly typed her keywords and quickly looked behind her and made sure her mother or father didn't pass by.

If it turned out Haru was actually into women (at the moment she was rationalizing that she was just lonely)... she shuddered to think of what would happen if her parents didn't approve. She was a normal girl. They were normal parents. Haru knew it was fine—at least she thought so. She just wasn't sure about her parents.

She pulled up a page discussing the topic of questioning sexuality. She rested her head atop her free hand as she clicked around and read the various pages. She was too oblivious of her own self, as well as insecure. Although she continued to insist to herself that it was fine, was it truly actually fine?

Haru looked at the ceiling to ponder her thoughts, and analyze an image of Asami in her head. Her friend. A good person that she didn't want to fall out with if it came to that. She knew it was a possibility, and she squirmed in her chair when she faced that possible outcome.

 _I guess I'll know sooner or later._

One of the suggestions on the webpage was to look up pornography related to whichever part of one's sexuality was at question. Haru blushed at the thought. She wasn't like that. Well, correction: she wasn't opposed to it, but she had never actively made it a point to seek out porn.

Well, truth be told, she never really delved into the adult part of the internet. She was so busy with her schoolwork most of the time that it never occurred to her, even though her male classmate Makoto Takiya kept reminding her to enjoy life some more. Haru supposed enjoying life meant enjoying the experience of figuring out everything.

She typed the hotkeys to mute her computer's sound. She took a deep breath, and entered a well-known adult site in the search bar.

"Haru?" her mother called out as she passed by the bedroom.

Haru exclaimed wordlessly and scrambled to minimize the browser. "Ah, ah... uh. Yes, mom?"

"Dinner's ready, dear."

Haru's heart was pounding. Did her mother see?

* * *

Dinner was quiet.

Haru quickly stood up as she cleared her plate. "I—I need to finish my homework," she said lowly, placing her plate in the sink. It wasn't really a lie when she thought about it.

"Alright," her mother nodded with a small smile. "Do your best."

Haru jogged up the stairs, made her way to her bedroom, and closed the door, locking it.

She sat down at her desk, procuring a set of earbuds and putting them on. She blinked twice, before maximizing the browser.

"Les...bian..." she murmured as she typed.

She pulled up a video that looked relatively safe. She opened another tab and clicked on a result on the homepage that was about heterosexual sex. She was going to make double sure.

She pressed play on the latter video. Within a couple of minutes of a romp between a plain man and a cute woman, Haru gagged and immediately closed the tab. That was absolutely disgusting.

It was time for the second video—the lesbian one.

Haru tentatively clicked it.

"Oh." She simply said as her eyes widened watching the lesbian video. She felt a tingling sensation between her legs, and a hand instinctively flew to her crotch. She was familiar with masturbation, and had done it a few times over the years, but she never thought to do so regularly. She cursed under her breath as she acknowledged that she wanted to touch herself.

She wanted to touch herself because she watched lesbian pornography.

 _Well, that settles it. I've got a crush on Asami-san and this is really hot,_ she thought as she lifted her uniform skirt and slid one hand into her underwear, exploring the general area before she gasped as she found the good spot.

She held in her breath as she rubbed back and forth, up and down. She closed her eyes and replayed the events in the video. She was feeling more and more good with each passing moment. She needed to rub faster, and she did so, until she bit her lip and let out a small, quiet sob when she felt her orgasm arrive, and her underwear became soaked as well as her chair. It was good.

 _Yep._

Never before had Haru come quickly to a conclusion about herself.

 _I'm gay._

She gulped as she processed this, and decided to tell her parents tonight. Because if she didn't do it now, she would never do it.

She shifted uncomfortably in her chair before she stood up to go change into pajamas (and dry underwear). _Note to self: don't do that there again. Save it for bed._

* * *

"Hey... uh, mom? Dad?"

Haru's mother looked up from her embroidery project, and her father looked up from his newspaper.

"I, uh, I need to tell you something."

Her parents nodded, prompting her to start.

Haru gulped again. Her heart was pounding, and her fingers were twitching.

She took a deep breath.

"I'm gay."

There was a pregnant pause.

Her father was the first to speak. "Are you sure about this?"

Haru nodded. "Pretty sure, yeah."

He responded with a shrug. "Alright."

Her mother smiled. "I agree. It's alright."

Haru raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Really?"

"Of course," her mother continued to smile. "You're still our daughter. We raised you to be honest with others and also yourself. This is perfectly fine with us."

Haru let out a sigh of relief.

* * *

Seven years passed by.

Haru never acted on her crush in high school; just simply lived life. It wasn't important to pursue romance at the time, especially because she wanted to pursue programming.

Programming was a pain in the ass most days, but she prevailed.

Except for a painful project that tested her sanity.

She ran away on the train, and let the train take her to the mountains.

Little did she know...


End file.
